85 Funny Work Quotes To Share With Your Colleagues

Humorous quotes can help you stay positive throughout the workday and allow you to develop a friendly rapport with your colleagues. Sharing these statements in person, via email or on a communal bulletin board can highlight your positive attitude and show that you’re a good team member. Understanding what quotes to reference can help you motivate your coworkers and be an empathetic and considerate member of your organization.

In this article, we list 85 funny work quotes to help you stay motivated and boost morale in your professional environment.

Funny work quotes about motivation

Staying motivated throughout the day is an essential aspect of executing your job duties efficiently and enthusiastically. Here’s a list of funny quotes to encourage you to finish your role-related tasks:

1. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing—that’s why we recommend it daily.” — Zig Ziglar

2. “People who never do any more than they get paid for, never get paid for any more than they do.” — Elbert Hubbard

3. “Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get.” — Ray Kroc

4. “Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” — Robert Orben

5. “If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.” — Claude McDonald

6. “The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown

7. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” — Dalai Lama

8. “You can’t have a million-dollar dream with a minimum wage work ethic.” — Zig Ziglar

9. “The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me.” — Ayn Rand

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10. “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” — Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

11. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says ‘I’m possible!'” — Audrey Hepburn

12. “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” — Milton Berle

13. “I’m not retiring, I am graduating… retirement means that you’ll just go ahead and live on your laurels and surf all day in Oceanside. It ain’t going to happen.” — Junior Seau

14. “The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.” — Vince Lombardi

15. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” — Joe Girard

16. “Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.” — George Burns

17. “You never become a howling success by just howling.” — Bob Harrington

18. “If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.” — Woody Allen

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19. “Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.” — Will Rogers

20. “Think like a proton. Always positive.” — Unknown

21. “There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.” — Beverly Sills

22. “Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” — Winston Churchhill

23. “There’s no lotion or potion that will make sales faster and easier for you — unless your potion is hard work.” — Jeffery Gitomer

24. “Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.” — Bill Murray

25. “My advice is not to wait to be struck by an idea. If you’re a writer, you sit down and damn well decide to have an idea. That’s the way to get an idea.” — Andy Rooney

Funny work quotes about appreciating your job

Humorous quotes can make you laugh and also encourage you to appreciate your role and motivate you to stay committed to your career. Here’s a list of funny work quotes to inspire you to appreciate your job:

1. “Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.” — Leslie Nielsen

2. “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” — Oscar Wilde

3. “I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.” — Jerome K. Jerome

4. “It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower

5. “You don’t get paid for the hour. You get paid for the value you bring to the hour.” — Jim Rohn

6. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” — Thomas Edison

7. “Your job is not just to do what your parents say, what your teachers say, what society says, but to figure out what your heart calling is and be led by that.” — Oprah Winfrey

8. “Work to become, not to acquire.” — Elbert Hubbard

9. “Find out what you like doing best and get someone to pay you for doing it.” — Katharine Whitehorn

10. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” — Betty Reese

11. “Be like a postage stamp. Stick to a thing till you get there.” — Josh Billings

12. “Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock.” — Pablo Picasso

13. “Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.” — Sam Ewing

14. “Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, “Certainly, I can!” Then get busy and find out how to do it.” — Theodore Roosevelt

15. “Anybody, somebody or nobody is ever going to make your life any more than you are willing to do for yourself. So, stop looking around for anybody to do something for you; instead, get your own body going and get it done now.” — Byron Pulsifer

16. “Aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment.” — Dilbert

17. “I’m not the smartest fellow in the world, but I can sure pick smart colleagues.” — Franklin D. Roosevelt

18. “My job is fun! I should change this line once in a while. My brain has started to realize that I am lying to it every morning.” — Anonymous

19. “Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster, it’s more like a cha-cha.” — Robert Brault

20. “Success looks a lot like failure up until the moment you break through the finish line.” — Dan Waldschmidt

Funny work quotes about business and sales

Here’s a list of funny work quotes you may appreciate if you have a career related to business or sales:

1. “My sales objective is to get my prospects to look at my products the same way I look at bacon.” — Kurt Mortensen

2. “You can’t just ask customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time you get it built, they’ll want something new.” — Steve Jobs

3. “Customers are like teeth. Ignore them and they’ll go away.” — Jerry Flanagan

4. “Business opportunities are like buses; there’s always another one coming.” — Richard Branson

5. “On any given Monday I am one sale closer and one idea away from being a millionaire.” — Larry D. Turner

6. “Do billboard salesmen record their sales on charts? If so, who’s at the top of the billboard charts for billboard sales?” — Ryan Lilly

7. “There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?” — Kin Hubbard

8. “Hustle until your haters ask if you’re hiring.” — Steve Maraboli

9. “My favorite sales book? The Bible. I would improve it. You know how we people are.” — Kare Anderson

10. “When you’re good at something, you’ll tell everyone. When you’re great at something, they’ll tell you.” — Walter Payton

11. “Hey, here’s a gourd!’ is not so different as, ‘Hey, here’s enterprise sales software!’ The language changes, but the humans are the same.” — Chris Penn

12. “My favorite sales book? Harvey Mackay’s Swim with the Sharks Without Being Eaten Alive. Why? Well, it’s the only sales book I ever read.” — Tristan Bishop

13. “If I tell you I want to be a door-to-door salesman, don’t knock it.” — Jarod Kintz

14. “Although your customers won’t love you if you give bad service, your competitors will.” — Kate Zabriski

15. “The difference between try and triumph is just a little umph!” — Marvin Phillips

16. “Ninety percent of selling is conviction and 10 percent is persuasion” — Shiv Khera

17. “Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around his or her neck that says, ‘Make me feel important.’ Not only will you succeed in sales, you will succeed in life.” ― Mary Kay Ash

18. “If you are not moving closer to what you want in sales (or in life), you probably aren’t doing enough asking.” — Jack Canfield

19. “Expect the best, prepare for the worst, capitalize on what comes.” — Zig Ziglar

20. “In sales, a referral is the key to the door of resistance.” ― Bo Bennett

Funny work quotes about staying focused

Depending on your role, you may find it easy to become distracted by tasks aside from your job, which can impact your ability to reach your goals. Here’s a list of funny work quotes to help you laugh at your situation and encourage you to refocus your attention on your career:

1. “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.” — Robert Frost

2. “Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn’t the work he’s supposed to be doing at that moment.” — Robert Benchley

3. “If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.” — Dave Barry

4. “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” — Douglas Adams

5. “Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.” — Rita Mae Brown

6. “His insomnia was so bad that he could not sleep during office hours.” — Arthur Baer

7. “Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.” — Don Herold

8. “Sometimes, I spend the whole meeting wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.” — Unknown

9. “We will continue to have more meetings until we figure out why no work is getting done.” — Unknown

10. “Sometimes, the best part of my job is that the chair swivels.” — Unknown

Funny work quotes about the weekend

You can boost morale in the workplace by sharing a message about the upcoming weekend. Here are some funny work quotes to consider:

1. “Friday makes Monday worth it.” — Andy Atticus

2. “Music always sounds better on Friday.” — Lou Brutus

3. “Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend.” — Unknown

4. “It is Friday… any plan of being a productive member of society is officially thrown out the window.” — Unknown

5. “Friday is a day to finish your goals for the week. It is a day to celebrate that which you set out to accomplish at the beginning of the week. Well done.” — Byron Pulsifer

6. “Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it is only Thursday.” — Unknown

7. “People wait all week for Friday, all year for summer, all life for happiness.” — Raimonda B.

8. “Here’s to another Friday of outward smiles and inward screams.” — Unknown

9. “Why is Monday so far away from Friday and Friday so bloody close to Monday?” — Unknown

10. “Weekends don’t pay as well as weekdays, but at least there’s football.” — S.A. Sachs